


Before

by Wulferious



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Don't read this if you haven't seen Infinity War, F/M, I have a lot of feels right now, Infinity War spoilers, Peter joins the Avengers before Civil War, Spoilers, fluff?, pre infinity war, trust me on this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-29
Updated: 2018-04-29
Packaged: 2019-04-29 15:19:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14475510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wulferious/pseuds/Wulferious
Summary: INFINITY WAR SPOILERS, READ AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION: (Y/N) Stark has killed someone on a mission. During an Avengers vacation to a lake with a cabin, the idea and weight of death fills her head. Peter notices she hasn’t come swimming and decides to investigate.





	Before

I saw Infinity War tonight and I needed to do a warm-up fanfiction before I started on a series I've been planning. Here it is. Please know that this story has two parts: the 'prologue' and the 'story'. The 'prologue' of this story is important to the rest as it sets up the theme, but it does contain EXTREME Infinity War spoilers. PLEASE don't let me ruin the experience of this movie. I won't be deleting this any time soon and if for some reason it gets taken down it will be on my tumblr (wulferious-fics.tumblr.com), or my Quotev, Wattpad and DeviantART pages under the same user name. See the movie before you read and don't spread spoilers when you do!  
Remember,   
#ThanosDemandsYourSilence! 

I hope you enjoy,   
Wulf  
~~~

**_Snap._ ** __

__The passing seconds in your head filtered into slow motion. Blinks were noticeable. Clouds of dust dispersed like smoke from a factory. It was over. You lost, and you knew it. The red planet you sat upon was full of rubble, not even from the battle you had fought but an hour ago. It was so quiet, even the chirp of a bird was becoming a distant memory. The calm wind was nowhere to be felt or heard, the dewy touch of a plant a forgotten pleasure on this planet. This place was a barren wasteland. A graveyard._ _

__“He did it,” a stranger commented. You think his name was Peter, like the boy holding your hand so tightly that if you were not in your suit, it would break. You tightly gripped his hand as well, heaving your breaths in a panic attack. No words were spoken. No words could be spoken. You were in some foreign world, an entirely different planet. All you wanted was for it to be over, but not like this. This ending was not even close to what you wanted. Not what you pictured._ _

__“Drax!”_ _

__Looking up from the ground, horror filled your heart. The large man covered in scars was fading away. So was the girl with bug-like feelers on her forehead. Immediately, tears welled up in your eyes as you saw them fade into a pile of dust. They defended you. One of them even saved your life. Now, their lives were slipping away and there was nothing you could do about it. All of them were gone, turned to dust within a matter of seconds._ _

__Tony looked over at Dr Strange, who was sitting nearby, exhausted and guilty. He too was beginning to disappear. You had only just met all of these people, but you felt such immense pain over their loss. “There was no other way.” Strange’s voice was soft as his shaking hands crumbled, “I’m sorry.”_ _

__Now there were three. That was all that was left on an entire planet. You didn’t understand. You weren’t supposed to be here. Why did you follow? Why were you here? What was the point if you were going to lose anyway? Tony, your father, was speechless. There the three of you sat, broken, beaten, bloody, nearly dead. You held Peter’s hand and Tony’s arm was draped across your shoulders. How would you get home? Would you get to go home? Where… where **was** home?_ _

__“(Y/N), I… I don’t feel so good.“ You looked over at your boyfriend, the same feeling enveloping you. You were speechless as your grip on his hand tightened. "I don’t know, I don’t know what’s happening.” His voice was urgent, afraid._ _

__"Peter… I…” The feeling increased, the dread, the fear, the confusion, the sorrow._ _

__As quickly as you could, your heart, soul and body grasped onto Peter as he, too, began to melt away. Tony’s grip slipped from your shoulders as he stood and moved to crouch in between his two kids as they held on to one another for dear life._ _

__“I-I don’t- (Y/N)! I don’t want to go, I don’t want to go, please, (Y/N)! Tony! I don’t want to go, I’m sorry!” Your heart was pounding. Peter shoved his face into the crook of your neck as you held him, his grip loosening on the fabric of your exposed shirt by your half-destroyed suit. The love of your life was already leaving you. You couldn’t even spend time together like the real couple you wanted to be. The two of you were so young, being ripped away from one another on a foreign planet. Peter was turning to dust. He was leaving you for good. He didn’t have a choice._ _

__You were full on sobbing now, the weight of your father joining in on the embrace made you fully realize that you, too, were barely grasping onto reality. You, too, were slowly reducing to dust._ _

__“I love you,” you cried through the tears and the pain. “I love you both so much!” Your fingers, your lungs, your heart beating in your chest started to crumble like stepping on a pile of leaves. **You were dying.** Years ago, you thought about what your last words would be. An entire speech worth of pouring your heart out. Just a few months ago you had been thinking about what it would be like to die. But now, unwillingly, you knew what it felt like and you knew those were the best words you could utter in the few seconds you had left. “I love you.”_ _

_~_

_You honestly had no idea how you landed in this situation, sitting at the edge of a dock as the sun set on a pleasant, summer day. You tried your best to be optimistic after a heavy mission just a few days ago, but the outcome of said mission that you caused weighed heavy on your mind. It comforted you to know and see that everyone was starting to let go, but you just… couldn’t._

_Everyone else looked as if they were recovering just fine. Envy pierced your heart as you saw Rhodey and your dad playfully flicking water at one another, Natasha, Sam, Steve, Clint and Pietro playing games with Clint’s kids. Guilt crushed your heart as you saw Wanda swimming and giggling as Vision floated cross-legged just over the surface of the water. You could be spending similar time with Peter._

_“Hey,” Peter broke your thought process tore your mind out of the guilt you were feeling._

_“Hey,” you replied, looking past your feet to see Peter treading the water and smiling up at you._

_“Why aren’t you swimming?” He asked, gesturing you to join in. You had dressed up in your cutest swimsuit (the one-piece black one with the pink ruffled skirt) with the intention of impressing your boyfriend, but your negative thoughts and actions caught up to you before you could get in the water._

_Your heart sank. You didn’t think you deserved all this; a vacation, relaxation. “I… don’t really feel up to it,” you answer. “You go have fun, don’t worry about me.”_

_Peter’s smile immediately faded. He waded toward you and pulled himself up on the dock, sitting next to you and thoroughly soaking the end of the towel you were sitting on. “Is it still bothering you?” He asked, placing a hand over yours, which had practically glued itself to the wood of the dock._

_You couldn’t hide your feelings from him. “Yes.”_

_“I… I don’t know how to comfort you,” he frowned, “but I wish I could.”_

_“It’s okay, Pete, you… you being here is enough.“ You glance between him and the group in the water, the ripples of the sunset glistening faintly. “Do… do you ever think about what it’s like to die?”_

_“Sometimes,” he answers, gripping your hand fully, lifting it from the dock’s surface. “I just hope that when it does happen, it’s when I’m old. When I’ve had a family, been successful, and proved myself as a hero.”_

_You smiled sadly at his ambition, but it returned to a frown shortly after. “I just hope I’m not alone when I die.”_

_“You’ll never be alone.” Peter placed a finger underneath your chin to make sure you made eye contact with him. “Not when you’re involved with me,” he chuckled, “I promise.”_

_Your heart beat a little faster. His reassurance was something you admired and craved when you weren’t feeling like yourself. “Thank you, Pete.”_

_Peter let go of your hand and scooched a little closer to you, wrapping his arm around your shoulders and little droplets of water rolled down your collarbone. Watching the sunset with Peter made you feel a little bit more at ease, but the thought of the future weighed heavy on your soul. You and Peter were still just kids. At age 15, you had already killed someone. What would that mean? What will happen?_

_“Do you want to go back in the water?” You asked, your voice barely above a whisper.  
“Are you sure?”   
“Yeah.”_

_You could feel Peter’s grin as he held your hand tight and pushed himself back into the water, dragging you down with him. Finally, you were able to crack a genuine smile and laugh as you surfaced, flicking water from your hair.  Maybe this vacation wouldn’t entail doom and gloom forever._

_Guilt still continued to consume you on the way back home. What if you had to kill another person? Would you be able to succeed as a hero? Would the Avengers be together forever? Will you and Peter be together forever? Would he really be with you as you died?_

_Perhaps you would find out soon._


End file.
